Hello lovely people,

Finally, my new website is out! And honestly, I cannot believe how long it took me.

Every time I was ready to work on it, something unexpected would come along and pull me in a completely different direction. I would sit down with good intentions and life would apparently have other plans for my afternoon and evening.

Coping with frustration is one of the things I find most challenging. And yes, even a yoga teacher feels stressed sometimes.

My father used to say to me: “But you’re a yoga teacher. You should never feel stressed…”

I used to get so annoyed when he said that. These days, I laugh and reply: “Imagine what I would be like WITHOUT yoga in my life!”

Apparently, completing yoga teacher training does not come with a lifetime exemption from irritation. A shame, really. That would have been an excellent selling point.

So today, I want to talk about frustration, making space for what we love and how we might spend these last months of the year. I also have something lovely coming up: a yoga retreat this weekend in Jaipur, which I have organised with my friend Sameera.

But first, let’s talk about what happens when life refuses to follow our carefully prepared schedule.

When things take longer than we hoped

A website taking longer than expected is one thing. Waiting for something deeply personal is another.

Perhaps you are waiting for your period to return. Perhaps you are navigating uncertainty at work, a difficult relationship, or a change you never asked for.

Whatever the situation, frustration often brings an extra voice with it: “I should be handling this better.”

That voice can be exhausting. We are already dealing with something difficult and now we are reviewing our performance while dealing with it!

Yoga helps me notice this second layer. Sometimes I can catch it early. Sometimes I notice it after I have already complained, become tense, and had an imaginary argument with someone who isn’t even in the room.

There is always another opportunity to practise.

I do believe we can learn from our hurdles. But I also think we need time. In the middle of disappointment, we may simply need support, a good cry, or someone who listens without immediately explaining what the universe is trying to teach us.

The lesson can wait until we are ready to hear it.

The yoga philosophy that changed how I see things

Learning about the philosophy of yoga was a real eye-opener for me. Discovering Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, particularly the yamas and niyamas, deepened my understanding of what it means to practise yoga.

Suddenly, there was so much to explore beyond the physical practice. How do I speak to myself? How do I respond when someone upsets me? What happens when I put effort into something and the result is completely different from what I hoped?

These questions made the teachings feel relevant to my actual life. Including the less graceful parts of it.

It is lovely to feel peaceful during meditation. Carrying some of that awareness into a frustrating conversation is where things become interesting!

The yamas and niyamas are the first two limbs of Patanjali’s eight-limbed path. They offer ethical guidance and personal disciplines: ways of considering our conduct, our relationships and our habits.

Among the yamas are ahimsa, non-harming; satya, truthfulness; and aparigraha, non-grasping. Among the niyamas are santosha, contentment, and svadhyaya, self-study.

For me, learning about them opened up a much deeper conversation with myself.

Take ahimsa. I can bring that principle into the way I respond to my own frustration. If something is already difficult, what happens when I add criticism? Could I acknowledge that I am struggling and speak to myself with a little more care?

Satya invites honesty. Sometimes that means admitting: “Actually, I am disappointed. This matters to me, and I wish it had happened differently.”

Santosha gives me something else to explore: can I appreciate what is here today while still wanting to grow or change something?

And aparigraha invites me to look at how tightly I am holding onto a particular outcome. I can care deeply about a project and still practise loosening my grip on the exact timetable I imagined for it.

My website has certainly given me opportunities to contemplate that one!

Pratipaksha bhavana: giving myself another possibility

One teaching that has been a particular game changer for me is pratipaksha bhavana, introduced in Yoga Sutra 2.33.

In the context of practising the yamas and niyamas, Patanjali offers the cultivation of an opposing attitude when obstructive thoughts arise.

What opened my eyes was the possibility of participating more consciously in my response. A thought can arrive very quickly, but I can pause before allowing it to decide how I speak or act.

The way I apply this in everyday life is to notice the thought, question it, and explore a response that is both kinder and more truthful.

For example, “This is taking forever. I will never finish it,” might become: “It is taking longer than I wanted. What can I realistically do today?”

“I should not feel stressed because I teach yoga,” might become: “I am human, and my practice gives me somewhere to turn when stress appears.”

That second one would have been useful to explain to my father a few years ago!

What matters to me is that the new thought feels believable. My mind is unlikely to accept “Everything is wonderful!” when I am clearly upset. But “I can meet this moment with a little more patience” gives me something practical to work with.

Then comes the action. Can I pause before replying? Can I explain what I need without attacking someone? Can I take a break and return to the problem when I have more perspective?

This is where the teaching becomes a practice rather than an interesting sentence in a book.

Learning to observe myself with curiosity

Svadhyaya, or self-study, helps me approach this with curiosity. What am I reacting to? Is there a genuine problem to address? Am I tired? Am I expecting myself to do more than is reasonable?

Sometimes frustration contains useful information. It may show me that I need support, a clearer boundary or a different approach. I want to listen to that information while being thoughtful about what I do with it.

That has been one of the most valuable discoveries for me: yoga philosophy gives me ways to explore my experience without immediately judging it.

I still feel frustrated. I still have moments when I would prefer the whole world to cooperate with my plans. Ideally, immediately.

But these teachings give me something to return to. I can recognise what is happening, soften some of the harshness and choose a small next step.

Learning about the Yoga Sutras changed the place yoga occupies in my life. The philosophy accompanies the practice and it also accompanies the conversations, disappointments and decisions that happen afterwards.

Three questions I ask each morning

During my morning meditation and pranayama practice, I take a moment to check in. Before deciding what I should accomplish, I ask what I need.

I invite you to try these three questions:

Give each question a little space. You do not need a profound answer.

Your body might ask for breakfast, a gentler practice, or an earlier bedtime. Your mind might need a break from comparing your progress with someone else’s. Your heart might ask you to soften towards yourself after a difficult conversation.

Sometimes the answer is very ordinary. That does not make it less useful.

Then choose one small action that honours what you heard. Listening becomes more meaningful when we allow it to influence the day.

Imagine how you would like to meet today

I also like to spend a little time visualising how I would like to be.

You can try this with an ordinary situation: a delayed plan, a busy afternoon, or a conversation you expect to find frustrating.

Imagine noticing the tension. Picture yourself pausing, taking a comfortable breath, and choosing your next words.

Mental imagery can evoke emotion and shares some processes with perception, although imagining something and experiencing it are different. I use this as a gentle rehearsal: an opportunity to explore the response I would like to practise.

Of course, when the actual moment arrives, I may still forget everything and become annoyed. I remain very much human.

But I can return to the intention. Even remembering to pause a little sooner feels worthwhile.

What would you like to make space for?

We have a little over two months left in the year.

I have been thinking about how easily we postpone the things we love until everything else is sorted. Once work is quieter. Once we feel better. Once we have more time.

And then another month disappears.

There are real responsibilities and limits, of course. But perhaps we can find a little room within them.

What have you been missing?

Time with a friend? A creative project? A quiet morning? The pleasure of doing something without needing to be particularly good at it?

Living these months fully might mean saying yes to an experience. It might also mean resting enough to enjoy the life you already have.

If you are navigating a missing period or another uncertainty, it can feel as though life is waiting alongside you. I hope there can still be moments of connection and pleasure while you seek the support you need.

You do not have to earn those moments by reaching a particular outcome first.

A Yoga retreat weekend in Jaipur, and gratitude for India

This weekend, Sameera and I are bringing people together for our yoga retreat in Jaipur!

Organising it has reminded me that making space for something we love takes practical effort. There are decisions, messages and the inevitable things that need sorting out.

But I am looking forward to sharing time and practice together.

And I keep coming back to how grateful I feel to be here in India.

It is not easy every day, especially with my poor Hindi…There is still plenty of smiling hopefully and wondering whether I understood the conversation.

Yet I love being in a place where spirituality is woven into daily life, where the Navratri festivities bring so much energy, and where there is Palak Paneer.

An important contribution to my happiness, I must say.

My new website is now ready, too. I would love you to explore it: you will find my story, resources on missing periods, yoga and Ayurveda, and a free guide with a Yoga Nidra practice

Visit my new website

And before you go, perhaps ask yourself:

What is one thing I would love to make space for before this year ends?

You are very welcome to reply and tell me.

With love,
Audrey